Tuesday, June 23, 2009

I hate seeing...

...self-righteous, judgmental mommies who are convinced there is one right way to parent, care for and raise children and they have the inside track.

Seriously, the majority of us love our children more than can be adequately expressed and are just doing our best and what we think is right for our kids in that moment.

Some days we rock; we are Supreme Mommy of the Universe. Some days we suck and some days we may be just this side of a call to DCFS. We're human, we're moms.

I have cloth diapered, baby-wore, co-slept, extended bf. I have also put my kids to bed without dinner, used a umbrella stroller, fed my kids processed, deep-fat fried, trans-fat, HFCS, fast-food crap and let them veg-out in front of the Wii for an extended number of hours (days ). I have helicoptered and practiced benign neglect. I have yelled and spanked and held and cuddled and ignored and cried and loved.

I look in the mirror every morning; I am well aware of my faults, short-comings, attributes and successes. I don't need another mom to rub it in my face when I've screwed-up or didn't follow her parenting plan and I want to apologize for the times I may have done that to any other mom.
...you may now return to your regular programming.

2 comments:

C. L. Hanson said...

I know how you feel! There's more than one way to do things, and the "one right way" folks are more a hindrance than a help! I wrote about my worst experience with unwanted parenting advice here.

Rebeckah said...

As long as you follow the major rule of parenting -- love, love, unconditionally love your children -- they will most likely survive and thrive. I'm a grandma now and I can assure you that any parent who hasn't been "wrong" in their parenting more than a few times is lying to you. I've made almost every mistake in the book and my poor children had to deal with my pervasive depression on top of that (although I worked very hard at trying to keep it from impacting them too much). But as adults they are smart, capable, in good, loving relationships, good parents, and a credit to me (although I don't really feel like I deserve the credit -- they do). Oh, and one more thing. Being able to admit you were wrong and apologize you your children when you do so is a fantastic parenting trait. It teaches them so much about how to deal with bad choices in life and how to learn from mistakes and, most of all, it affirms that they are people deserving respect. Mistakes are acceptable, particularly when they can be learned from.